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The next day evening ……

I am surfing Facebook !! You once let me remove one pic from Orkut just because I put my arms around you .. that too was hardly visible.. But in this pic one guy has his hand around you visibly but you have no problem at all…I still remember those things too… I remember things for long dear….. I don’t know how will you behave if you see me putting hands around another girl… You just get angry even when only doubting that I am still outside yesterday.. But when i say something about you, u will say “they are just my friends.. no problem at all”

So u mean if another guy put his arms around you.. you have no problem of  finger pointing.. but when it comes to me you are scared….
Have u ever think about it? Even your Orut pics has lots of pics where some other guy hold you very tight.. Are you offended? The same time i upload one pic and it was a taboo for you.. What was the difference? You don’t have problem with them but me..

And yesterday when I took your friend to hospital and come back home, I sense your behavior change abruptly and now you are behaving like nothing happened…What about all the night outs that you go with other friends of yours? Do you ever even think what should I be feeling then? What if I go night out with some of my female friends? What would you think?

And for your information… I didn’t even look at another girl in any other way. Yesterday Jessica was sick and even Marilyn was sick.. There was no one to take her to hospital.. so I thought I will go along with her and I did it just because she is your close friend…. There couldn’t be any other reason at all..
I won’t say you are doubting me but somehow there was a slight difference in you yesterday…I don’t go and put my arms around other gals as your friends may do.. I spoke to my female friends very politely and respectfully.. I don’t crack non-veg jokes with them.. I do make jokes but its always a simple jokes….

I don’t say you hide anything (when you go out with friends for night out). Even though u used to tell me, do u ever listen when I say I don’t like? Do you ever think what I must be feeling? Why do u feel so bad when you started thinking (even though I was driving home in reality) that I am out somewhere? And I didn’t hide anything yesterday.. I told you where I was and what I was doing.. You still have problem…

So why don’t you tell me what was the problem..? How would I understand what is the reason u just got angry? Till now i was thinking the reason was Jessica… Why don’t you tell me last night itself?? If you are angry with me I will need something so that I would understand what exactly the problem..is!!

So what do u want me to be? When I think and tell you what I don’t like you will tag me as a conserved guy. But when i say anything about my likes/dislikes, they are all your friends. .It works with all…..

Do you even think I may not like if any other guy comes and put their arms around you? Is it valid for me to say anthing here….??  Do you even resist atleast because of the concern i have when they do that? What about my thinking and my concern about you? Is my thinking valid to you at all??

Now you wont reply….

Is my thinking valid at all to you? Am i so not-understanding? What is the problem with me? You change your mood at times, talk to me when you want and didn’t reply the messages and behave strangely even before i understand what the problem is…. dear I am so filled with question now!! You may stay silent and not reply back but I still wudn’t like the conversation to stop here….

I will stay on this and i think I have every right to ask whatever I say now…!! And I also think you sud in anyway reply to all the messages I have sent just now coz we both are the only person involved in this discussion.. Pls read all the messages I have send and do reply me…

And pls don’t just try to wrap up things in  a single message!! Pls reply to me a message each for all the messages I have sent..!! I will be thankful if you do that for me coz its difficult to understand for me tooo….

The other night we went to Mocha(restaurant). I saw you hugging your good friend when we parted away( I am not offened)… but the night we went to Oaks(restaurant), when i tried to hug you you were offended…!! What am I, Am i dirty, coz i was bit drunk that night?? What was your problem there…??

Dear I have written down all the things I always think about whenever I am angry.. I hope you do understand…. Whenever I get angry I always over-react coz i remember all these things again and again… I know you will suggest me to forget all the things but dear, I am really sorry that I remember things.. It’s natural for me….

Apart from all these I never have any problem with you ever.. In fact I love you a lot.. Even though i always tell you “I made you know whenever I have some problems about you” , some how I was never good at explaining what I want you to know.. I end up telling something from betwen the lines and I end up thinking I am too not-understanding…

Dear you may not realise, what you are to me.. but I think the fight I always have is not because I am a conserved guy.. Its just because I love you too much…

If you do think you can reply… Please do…!! I am not angry but still i wouldn’t want the conversation to end uselessly..!!

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010 at 12:02 am and is filed under Blogroll, More than words. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.